10. When nobody wants to play Beyonce.
9. When someone comes up to you and declares that she’s going to make a move on an older man, who is in a serious relationship. “Oh no,” you say, stroking her hair. “Don’t be that girl. Don’t be the girl he sells out to his girlfriend when he confesses that he made out with you tonight, tomorrow,” and she nods. Moments later they are dancing, rocking side to side, his hands clenching handfuls of her party dress and ass.
8. When everything is great and someone looks at your face and asks what is wrong and you’re like ‘Nothing!’ and she’s like ‘No, really’, and then you realize you’re just old and tired, haggard. With loose skin.
7. When your period starts.
6. When all you can think about is that half a burrito in the fridge.
5. When you realize that if you do not leave, you’re staying to watch the sunrise with these people and that means sitting upright until 7:30, watching the cats and wondering how long you can hold your urine.
4. When your champagne and cranberry juice is gone, and you’ve only had one A&W mug full.
3. When you realize you’re sober enough to care too much about what songs come out of your iPod, and people you would like to be making out with are coming up and requesting songs to bump and grind 18 year olds in American Apparel minidresses and leather jackets to, like this is seventh grade and you’re a local radio DJ, refusing to play Shoop even though you have it, because your life is one long hot iron to the face. And you can’t make out with a 13 year old in the station van, because you’d be arrested, and never considered for the morning show.
2. When the tiny lesbian insults you, laughing, hugging you and snuggling the side of your face.
1. Before you convince yourself to stay.
sounds like a killer party.
chlo, this made me think of you.